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I have been meeting Checker's, a speckled amber and white quarter horse, down the road from me in the mornings. He recognizes me and saunters over to love and be loved. Our agreement is simple: if you come to me with an open heart, I will come to you with mine.
I speak softly to him, with a tone I'm sure he understands, as his eyes soften, and he moves into a deep peace, which looks almost like sleep. As we talk, I sense subtle currents of distrust running between us at times, like sparks. Will he bite me? Will she spook or scold me? Will he jump away and run? There is no denying we are both loving and distrusting creatures. There's nothing wrong or broken in that. It is a byproduct, a side effect of being alive, but I saw so clearly that the legs that led me toward him, the heart that swelled in joy and awe at the sight of him, and my hands that searched for the soft spots of his nose and ears, had one intention. One foundational impulse: To love and give love.
It's clear that love is the motivating force behind everything I do, and it's no different for Checkers. We came together like magnets built of the same goodness and information, instinctually coming together to celebrate and worship, and to give of ourselves as generously as possible.
Each time a thought of worry bubbled up from inside me, I told Checkers that fear was with me. I would allow the feeling and express it to him so to not let it divide us. Checkers understood because each time I told him of my concern, he would take his nostril to my mouth and breathe deep sighs of breath into me and over the two of us. I felt he was trying to clear the stagnant air of disconnect. He, too, would express his moments of skepticism by shifting his body away from me or perking his ears backward. I would ground into my feet and let the feelings pass. Together we continued to let go until we were soft and undefended in every way, feather light and incandescent. If a strong wind blew, we would both fall over.
Inside the body of each of us, against all wariness, we still come joyfully toward one another as if to cry out in wonder at one another's beauty. The law, underneath and inside my, and your aliveness is love. Abounding love that magnetically attracts and connects humanity. To remember, really remember, this is to diffuse the estrangement we suffer daily.
I know from experience that you can divide, close off, stunt, and shield yourself from connecting. You can run away from the invitation every day. You can avoid and suppress the impulse of your joy, of your very life, but it will serve nothing of value.